Gently falls the bakula

I have always been a great fan of sudha murthy's writing it is simple straight and very honest , neither filled with prejudices nor vanity.

Recently i laid my hands on this book by title "Gently falls the bakula".

First of all bakula is a common flower , which is normally goes unnoticed as it is not very attractive but retains its fragrance for a long time even after it has dried.

It is a very simple book story of a young girl by name srimati(The hidden meaning is amazing it is the title for any married woman) ,from a small town in hubli, who is extremely brilliant and chooses history which is uncommon for a bright student , but achieves her best in it ,But at the end of her masters , drops her career interests and chooses to be a wife of a long time friend and neighbor of hers named srikanth ,though it all appears rosy to her in the beginning , later she feels like a bird in a golden cage when srikanth for his career interests ignores her and more so mocks at her skill in history as a useless knowledge, But she not only endures but also encourages him in his career for a long time but one fine day decides to end her endurance and moves out to take care of her life and interests. It is the fact that this story was written much before i was born and it still holds today amazed me and made me think over it.

I am not talking about page 3 Hi-fi girls of Bangalore times , nor am i talking about Pub going woman Whom people like mutalik despise(I care a damn about them, i detest both men and women of that sort but that is individualistic).

It is about a girls from an orthodox , society caring, higher middle class to middle class with dreams , dreams!not as in romantic bollywoodish dreams , but the one like Abdul kalam defines , "Dream is not something which you see when you sleep , but it is one which does not allow you to sleep".

One thing i want to make clear is ,No i am not a feminist ,Not anymore actually ,because I have come to think that feminism is about asking rights for women in a Man's world and i strongly detest it , It belongs to everyone equally. And also because i don't despise all men , only the one's with bloated Ego.

But Does it really belong to everyone equally at present is a question , generally As i see people around me , It is always a woman's responsibility to hold the strings of the family be it parents ,spouse , siblings or in laws , It is a woman who is blamed for a soured relationship , Is is because men have intelligently tagged woman to be "kshamaya dharitri" ? Is there a limit on patience? ,Problem is every one thinks the limit tends to infinity! , Though i definitely dont suggest to ignore either career or family , I guess people should know how to balance , I really wonder how some successful women who manage everything so gracefully.

Immediately the follow up question i get is why is a woman who has strong career interests taken as a career oriented woman with no family ties and despised , but a man with career interests is taken as smart and hardworking , why is this differentiation ? Was this done by lazy stupid women who used men as working donkeys and enjoyed luxuries or this is the work of group of men to avoid competition with women, as i think many woman are more mature and strong emotionally and intellectually than men.

Why is it that always marriage comes a first priority to a girl and not a guy , why is it there is a myth that a girl/woman needs to be protected all through life first by her father then husband and son , BS!(I really enjoyed reading in TOI recently that a women hit 2 men who was stalking her and snatched their bike keys and put them in jail).I guess it is the male EGO at work here.

I guess these are the questions which any girl of my age will have over generations , but wonder when they will be answered and who is to answer , is it us who have to take control and answer or is it the society which should accept the reality? But again if you say society what is society ? Is it again men with no brains but big ego??? It really boils my blood if they say in news that women are given equal opportunities at different fields of work , but who is giving??? I guess it is just made by men to make women feel that it is a Man's world.

Now if I wonder Why did i write this blog , I guess it is just my frustrated mind at work :).
.Actually if i think over again , I guess it should not matter what others think of you , if you are strong enough to know you are right :D .And i wish no more bakula falls unnoticed.