Quarter life crisis

Every one talks about this mid-life crisis even teen-age crisis but I have always wondered if it is only me who is going through this quarter/early twenty life crisis, But i have encountered quite of lot of people who also are going through the same phase as i am! which actually is a good news to me.

Actually it all started one Saturday morning when i was lazily trying to get up with sun shining bright by the window.Thought as to what am i doing in life as a hobby gave me a shock of my life but then regaining my composure i thought let me try to list down probable one's at least hmmm.. yes i wanted to learn music in school but it was quashed when that teacher didn't teach me beyond sa pa sa's.. for over a month (poor impatient me)! then there was karate which didn't even last for a week , then.... haan there was/is painting but i am so amateurish that i don't think it counts but at least i enjoy it nevertheless..I don't think reading novels / occasional cooking counts !! Now i was in serious trouble!?!.. Even work i always feel that i could do better than what I'm doing now..

So what do i do in life????led to my quarter life crisis !

so Now let me put my perspective of what is this quarter life crisis and what is the solution?

First of all as any other crisis it is directionless/aimless feeling that starts creeping.. and then starts engulfing one's self.

I have always had short term goals in life right after i passed out of class 7 , may be it is because of the exam oriented education IE thrust, but not only were we not denied of any additional activities but (anything but for sports for me ;=)) were encouraged to do so which did remainder of the time that did not occupy exam preparation , but be it anything there was a goal set and not only achieving it was a great fun but failure was also taken equally well of course with few drops of tears but with fiercer determination. It was all healthy competition and sweet jealousy which makes one better.Especially once out of high school there was a clear cut definition of life for next 2 years with 12Th and cet!! advice were so packaged that there would be no life without doing well in them , but it was nevertheless enjoyable schedule slogging for every damn test/exam making fun of it with friends , best was ways to avoid college to prepare for tut exams,anyways there was a schedule and goal !! Going on engineering had an additional goal of placements along with exams/coding et al,But there was also the feeling of a team and common goal especially during college projects and the small ego fights were forgotten on next meet.

But Then All of a sudden when passed out of college and beginning to work ,it appeared as though the best part of life has just started ,suddenly with more freedom with money like a direct promotion from pocket money to handsome salary,weekend getaways with friend life looked like a bed of roses .....but now with 2 years into it suddenly the same life which was so lustrous and colorful has started looking as though its now being played on a black n white screen.

Life has started looking meaningless and mainly the question that pops is "is this all??".Somehow that feeling of a team for college project with by 2 tea and vada sambar in canteen / coll lab is lost in the lavish team rooms.(ofcourse there are times this life appears fun too but nostalgia always creeps in.)

Yes there is work ,Actually lots of work but the scene is changed.. there no longer is there is that fun in the short term goal which thrills which frustrates which at the end makes you feel contented .. of course i'm not forgetting the short term long term goal set in half yearly reviews but that feels more like a process than concern ,may be its my own shortcoming but still something doesnt feel right , it is acually the thought of what would i be 10 years hence appears to be the worst nightmare especially the answer which might be "do the same thing" scares more!.. , it appears to me that I'm running a race where distance seems infinite and don't know what is the use and who are other contenders !!!

Somehow there is no adrenaline rush ... everything is just perfect to a bystander but still there is something vacant gnawing at back of the mind , Its a feeling of nothingness,..

Now i don't want to sound like mother Teresa but definitely one thing that bothers me is what am i doing to this society , where more than half the population is below poverty line and their main thought is how to fetch next meal , would they even care about the s/w developed or admire advancements in science in the world , isn't it our the so called educated mass's responsibility to help such people? but inability to do so(I blame myself for this ) irks more and adds to overall a feeling of voidness.

But... I am sure like any other problem time alone will give its best solution and will pull out of this quick sand scene :).